Dr. Stanley Goldstein - Author and Psychologist

Some parents believe their child's emotional difficulties derive from excessive video gameplay but this is not true. Video games are heavily obsessive-compulsive. An obsession is a repetitive thought and a compulsion is a repetitive behavior. An example is repeatedly worrying that one did not lock a door and then continually checking that it was done. Thus both youth and adults who play video games excessively do so because they're anxious, and the gameplay reduces their anxiety using the mind's instinctive obsessive- compulsive ego defense.
So it is anxiety which creates excessive gameplay and not the gameplay which creates anxiety or emotional difficulties. To reduce their child's play, a parent should try to discover what is distressing their child and alleviate it, alone or with the aid of a mental health professional. Only then will the gameplay become less important to them. Odering their child not to play the game won't work and will create the feeling they are misunderstood and arouse distrust.

An October 4, 2024 Wall Street Journal essay ("Why Do Older People Waste Their Time Playing Dumb Phone Games?") aroused these thoughts - Getting old isn't easy. It causes anxiety which the mind naturally tries to reduce using its innate obsessive-compulsive ego defense and video game playing is heavily obsessive-compulsive. This explains why such games are popular with other age groups too,  especially anxious troubled teenagers since it reduces their anxiety while playing them.

While both participants made good suggestions (the need to "harden" schools against intrusion; hire more security staff; provide more student mental health services) what is equally important is public education. Children aren't born with parenting instructions and the general level of knowledge of child psychological development and developmental psychopathology (a term coined by my doctoral advisor) among the public, teachers, doctors, and the legal system is low.

The basic ego capacities, those governing control of behavior and thinking, modulation of mood, distinguishing reality from fantasy, and developing a sense of who one is (the "sense of self") depend on experiencing a "good-enough" though not perfect parenting. The great power of the unconscious over behavior during childhood and adult life is another critical factor.. Pamphlets and instructional video explaining this, in a supportive non-judgmental fashion, might produce significant benefit at relatively low cost.